If at First You Don't Succeed......

.....try, try again. It seems to be the motto of my boys. Impressive you say? Consider that what they are trying to succeed at is driving their mother insane. Those of you who know me well know what a nightmare Tanner was from about 8 months until about 4 years or so. You also know that when I found out I was having another boy, I cried for at least 2 weeks (actually the next 5 months of pregnancy, really). So you should find it to be no surprise that any hint that Tayler may be becoming another "Tanner" would send me to the looney bin. I'm about there! I'll give you some examples of the unfortunate similarities:

1 - Diaper Removal: Tanner was infamous for taking off diapers when he had filled them, particularly in his crib. So we resorted to duct taping them on (for real). For the past few weeks, Tayler has begun to do the same. We got lucky for a long while, with all of the diapers being just wet. Unfortunately, last Friday, our luck ran out. Every time I walked into Tayler's room, it really smelled. I took out all of the diapers in there sitting around, but no luck. I opened the window. No luck. Then I remembered finding him with no diaper that morning. No, he couldn't have....but he had. I looked at his crib in panic, and found a small smear on one of the slats. In fear, I pulled the crib out, and there it was, down the wall, the base boards, and best of all, in a pile on my carpet! I'm buying stock in duct tape.

2 - Artistic abilities: Some of you may know of Tanner's innate artistic talents. He could decorate anything most permanently with a marker, including walls, doors, furniture, himself, and yes, even his friends. It all began with the front of one bathroom door. So yesterday, I found Tayler with an orange (non-washable might I add) marker, coloring the same said door. I'm a master at removing permanent marker however, and will just have to invest in another case of Off Skintastic Mosquito Repellant....

3 - The Escape Artist: Tanner began opening doors, dead bolts, toy packaging (yes, even the mom-proof kind) and everything else at about 18 months. He would run out the front door before I even knew he had moved. So, now that Tayler's 18 months, he, of course can do the same. We have, again, invested in a full stock of annoying baby-proof door handles.

Tayler had so much promise. He was so sweet and gentle and, well, easy. I guess it's my fault really. I let Tyson convince me it couldn't ever be the same. Sounds something like the reason we had Tanner 9 months and 5 days after our wedding....fool me once, shame on you.....Tayler's just finishing the job that Tanner so nearly fulfilled.

Word choices, prayers, and dirty looks...

It seems like every time I turn around, my kids are more grown up. In fact, I think they believe they have surpassed my level of intelligence, and so must now teach me. Take, for example, the conversation I had with McKayla the other night:



McKayla: I think that C.S. Lewis, Judy Blume, and Beverly Cleary are my favorite authors.
Me: They do write fun books, don't they.
McKayla: No, Mom, I think I like them because they use very good word choices. (Said in a very you-wouldn't-understand sort of way.)

Excuse me for believing that my eight year old was just looking for a fun reading experience.

And then there's Tanner. He loves to say the family prayer. In fact, he'll beat anyone up who tries to stop him. I'm not sure how that all plays out in the eternal scheme, but we're glad he is so determined to pray. His general routine goes something like this:

"Thank you for this day. Please help us to be a family together forever. Please bless McKayla for all of her sweetness. Please bless Tayler for all of the joy. Please bless Daddy for going to work and earning money. Please bless Mom that she can have power to clean the house better. Amen."

Apparently, I have no sweetness, joy, or work ethic... I just need to get the house clean. I realize he's doing it to be sweet (probably stemming from the "All I do is clean all day long and all you kids do is undo what I've already done" comments he hears on a regular basis), but come on. I don't think it's being answered!


Now you'd think that Tayler would be incapable at 18 months of showing me he's in charge, but if you've seen his "dirty look" that he now does even on command, you'll realize that he too is way beyond me. I guess that's life. Someday they'll all turn 21 and realize that I'm not as ignorant as they thought. Or maybe not......